Doctor Jokes
PHYSICAL EXAMINATION
A young man goes to a doctor for a physical examination. When he gets into the room, the man strips for his exam. He has a dick the size of a little kid's little finger. A nurse standing in the room sees his little dick and begins to laugh hysterically.
The young man gives her a stern look and say, "You shouldn't laugh, it's been swollen like that for two weeks now!"
WILL IT HURT MUCH, DOCTOR?
A woman goes to her doctor who verifies that she is pregnant. This is her first pregnancy. The doctor asks her if she has any questions. She replies, "Well, I'm a little worried about the pain. How much will childbirth hurt?"
The doctor answered, "Well, that varies from woman to woman and pregnancy to pregnancy and besides, it's difficult to describe pain."
"I know, but can't you give me some idea?" she asks.
"Grab your upper lip and pull it out a little..."
"Like this?"
"A little more..."
"Like this?"
"No. A little more..."
"Like this?"
"Yes. Does that hurt?"
"A little bit."
"Now stretch it over your head!"
BIRTH CONTROL PILLS!
An elderly woman went into the doctor's office. When the doctor asked why she was there, she replied, "I'd like to have some birth control pills."
Taken aback, the doctor thought for a minute and then said, "Excuse me, Mrs. Smith, but you're 75 years old. What possible use could you have for birth control pills?"
The woman responded, "They help me sleep better."
The doctor thought some more and continued, "How in the world do birth control pills help you to sleep?"
The woman said, "I put them in my granddaughter's orange juice and I sleep better at night."
